Have you found yourself wondering why COVID-19 is happening or asked yourself if we are all being punished for something? Is the higher power giving us a break or a big ol’ slap in the face?

On a daily basis I struggle to come to grips with our current global pandemic. I wake up most mornings asking is this all for real or is it just a bad dream? But as I ask myself these questions, I’m reminded that Covid-19 has also given me time to reflect and slow down the insane pace I was operating at

I have heard a variety of theories on COVID-19 from people and from the ‘internet’. Some say this is a way for mother nature to heal because of the abuse we have incurred on our planet. Others say the Corona virus is a hoax or was man-made for whatever bizarre or messed up reason. My always good intentioned Jewish mother tells me that God is asking us to self-reflect and make some serious changes in the way we behave and treat ourselves and others around us.

But no matter who you talk to or what ‘source’ you get information from, have you asked yourself this question? Why is this happening to our world? Why is this happening to my family? Why is this happening to ME? 

I am a mother to 3 daughters ages 17, 14, and 10 years old.  I work 2 full time jobs and have a multitude of projects on the go. I hustle it hard every day.

 I am a Registered Nurse and Lactation Consultant (RN BN IBCLC). I work 4 days a week at a local Calgary hospital in addition to running Nourish. Before COVID-19, Nourish was a booming little biz. I’d work my 8 hour day at the hospital then leave work to see one and sometimes even two clients before making it home. My one day off from the hospital and most weekends were booked up consistently with Nourish clients. 

Earlier this year, Nourish went through a re-brand and website redesign with the help of Anstice Communications and Amanda Sewell Design. I was seeing more clients than ever before and was so close to fulfilling my dream of going casual at the hospital and being able to dedicate my time primarily to Nourish. I had it all planned out in my mind and everything was lining up beautifully. 2020 was going to be my year!! My little business had finally grown big enough to sustain a healthy income in order to go casual at the hospital.

I love being busy. I love feeling accomplished and I won’t lie, I enjoy the extra income I am able to bring in for my family. But my children routinely ask me, “Mom, are you leaving again to see a client?” My mother would regularly tell me, “ Leanne, you need to slow down” and my husband who has always been very supportive of my business and project endeavors was starting to get frustrated with the crazy work/home life balance I was leading.  Day to day life was getting hectic and I was starting to feel the pace I was moving at was not sustainable long term. 

Then COVID-19 happened and my dream quickly came to a halt.

Business has drastically slowed. I am not seeing as many clients in their homes, I can not run monthly breastfeeding workshops or keep the Nourish drop-in clinic open. I am still seeing clients virtually, but not on a daily basis. Covid-19 has forced me to slow down. But to be perfectly honest, it’s been a blessing disguised in the form of a pandemic. I knew it was time for a change in pace in order to be more present for my family.

But did I really need this kind of wake up call to slow down?

 Like I said in my last blog (Pandemic Life of a Grateful Health Care Worker) I am grateful for so many things at the moment. I am still able to work and support breastfeeding families in the hospital and home settings. I have many amazing clients that continue to support Nourish by ‘buying local’ and purchase products through the Nourish shop page. I am healthy, I have a roof over my head, my family is safe and my sister just had a healthy baby girl. So yes, I am grateful for so many things but also relieved that I finally have some time to breathe and take a step back  from all the other projects I had on my plate.

I mentioned earlier that I like to be busy. I usually have a project or two or three on the go at one time. I don’t really know where this need to be busy all the time comes from? I do feel that if I’m not generating additional income, or working on some new project, I am not being a productive member of society. It may come from being a first born overachiever and having a strong desire to set a good example for my daughters. I want to show them that if you put your mind to something and work hard, you can make anything happen. I also want to show them that they have the ability to take care of themselves. They don’t need to rely on anybody else to achieve their goals personally or financially. I want my daughters to be strong, independent, self-sufficient women. 

I am very blessed to have a super supportive husband. He lets me bounce new business ideas off him all the time and listens patiently as I ramble on about breastfeeding and generating passive income. He comes with me to meetings, helps me with techy stuff, takes behind the scenes photos, and drops off products for my clients. He drives the kids to school every morning, picks them up most afternoons and takes them to their extracurricular activities. If it weren’t for his love, support, and flexible work schedule, I would not be able to do half of what I do.

Now I will share some of the projects I was and am currently still working on. You can judge for yourself if you think I’m crazy or just really really really like to be busy. 

Project # 1 was the Momma Market by Nourish. I established this market in the fall of 2019. This family friendly event was to take place at the Calgary Jewish Centre on Sunday April 5th. I had over 30 vendors with a health/family/wellness focus and 5 guest speakers lined up for the day. The market was definitely taking up more of my already limited time but I was very much looking forward to the big day…..then COVID-19 happened and it had to be postponed. I still plan to host the market when the Jewish Centre reopens and it is safe and allowable to socially gather again. But for now, all I can do is work on the Momma Market website and help advertise the vendors and guest speakers that were planning to participate in the day.

Project # 2 consisted of hosting a full-day Team Nourish Workshop on Saturday April 25th. That was also cancelled due to COVID-19. I am so lucky to work alongside so many great professionals who were going to lead keynotes and workshops in their areas of specialty. The workshop was going to feature a pelvic floor physio, a psychologist to talk about postpartum depression/anxiety, a sleep consultant, a dietitian, an infant/child first aid and CPR instructor and a talk by Boobyfood over the lunch hour. I hope to reschedule the workshop for sometime next year.

Last but not least is project #3 and the piece de resistance- CommUNITY. I am launching a magazine a la AVENUE magazine top 40 under 40 style highlighting some of the amazing women in our Calgary Jewish community. CommUNITY’s vision is to unite women and foster new relationships within our community. My goal was to feature 60 women in the launch edition and I am happy to report we sold out and surpassed our goal. We have already completed the photo shoots and are moving on to the art direction phase to have the magazine professionally laid out before it goes to print.  I have had the pleasure of working with and getting to know so many fabulous women throughout this experience. I was hoping to launch the magazine at a celebratory brunch at the Canyon Meadows Golf Club on June 14th, but sadly I think it will have to be postponed until later this summer. CommUNITY lives on just at a slower pace… and for now, I can’t complain about that

So as you can see I was and for the most part still am one very busy mama. I realize that I need to slow things down because working 2 full time jobs and having 3 pretty major projects on the go at once is a lot to take on at one time. So when I ask myself why this is all happening I don’t really have a ‘global’ answer, but I can certainly say that COVID-19 has forced me to slow down but in a good way. I need to evaluate what I have going on in my life, prioritize, and make some new changes going forward. Once all returns to normal in the world, and Nourish is a bustling little biz again, I plan to go casual or reduce my hours at the hospital. I need to spend more time with my children in the mornings, take them to school, and be more present for them in the evenings. I love to hustle and I love the work I do supporting breastfeeding families in the home and hospital settings, but I certainly can’t do it all and be the mother, wife, daughter, and entrepreneur I was destined to be.